Monday, August 9, 2010

My Shark Boyfriend.

So, many were baffled by the meaning of this picture I posted on facebook. Allow me to explain. 

I'll keep it short. When I was a little girl, I had a reoccurring dream. In this dream, I live on a small island. The kind of small island town where nothing ever happens and everyone knows everyone else's boring business. A hot new guy moves into town. Simultaneously, girls start going missing. Where'd they go? Where'd they go? It can't be the hot guy. He's way to nice and attractive. No one knows. But I start following hot guy around. I follow him and some awful girl to the beach late one night. I watch them go out for a dip. I see a struggle out in the water. Awful blood curdling screams from the awful girl! Fins splashing around in the water! Silence. They've been eaten by sharks! But then, he slowly comes out of the water. Totally unfazed. Naked, but unfazed. They find her mangled body washed up on shore (what's left of it) and declare it a Shark attack!! (Why I didn't report what I saw, I don't know, but that's a 9 year olds dream for you) It gets weirder. I confront him. YES! I confront the boy who turns into a shark and eats people! He is of course bewitched by my brainy beauty and gumption and vows to eat only fish. Then we make out. (as best as a 9 year old dreaming she's sixteen can do). The end. Pretty good, right? I had this dream SO MANY TIMES throughout my life and I miss it. I miss my shark boyfriend! That ad for Shark Week just made me think of him. Sigh.

Off to bed I go. Maybe he'll come visit me. 


  1. This comes as a total surprise to me. The only nightmares I ever recall Jenny having growing up as a child were those involving not completing some class assignment and her mortal fear that the teacher would be mad at her. She was such a pleaser as a child.

  2. Well, Mom, would you really expect the child version of me to tell you that I made out with a shark boy?

  3. Most things you did as a child never surprised me except the time you spilled the bottle of black indigo ink on the carpet and pushed the bed over it to hide your evil deed.